Not All Emotions Are Fun...And That Is Normal
Not all emotions are fun... yep... and that sucks, but guess what.. we have to deal with them anyways. Hiding from your uncomfortable emotions does not actually solve any of your problems. Self-medicating doesn't work either. When did we get to this place of thinking that every single minute of every single day was supposed to be all sunshine and rainbows? Is it really all social media and reality TV's fault that we think this way?
I have some news that is going to be pretty very devastating for some of you...
ANXIETY is HEALTHY,
ANXIETY is NORMAL,
and ANXIETY is NECESSARY.
Anxiety is another word for your survival instinct. Its that little voice in the back of your head that says " If I don't buy food I'll die", or "maybe I should be more careful when I drive... so I don't die", and "I should probably go to work today so I can keep paying the mortgage, not become homeless... and die" ... do you see the pattern here?
We are all motivated by our survival instincts and that includes, at the most primitive level, responses to anxiety.
Day after day after day I have clients who come to my office and tell me they have "anxiety" and they want it "gone". Very few are happy with my response of "that's not possible". But after a quick explanation, they begin to understand that "anxiety" is not their problem nor their enemy... its their misunderstanding of the purpose of anxiety that is causing the problem.
Now lets get something clear here; I am not talking about anxiety DISORDERS. Anxiety disorders are different than normal healthy anxiety. Anxiety disorders are when the level of anxiety you are experiencing is GREATLY out of proportion to the stress causing your anxiety. Literally there is a disorder in your level of anxiety. The problem is that our society has come to the, seemingly unanimous decision, that all anxiety is a disordered.
And I'm here to tell you... NO... that's not true. In order to have an anxiety disorder you must have a level of anxiety that is ***significantly out of proportion to what someone else would experience in your exact same situation***.... see that bolding? That was on purpose.... that was for you...because you... YOU out there... Yeah YOU ....the one saying there are not enough hours in a day to get it all done... Yeah... YOU with the 9-5 job, with 2.5 kids, the dog, a full-time working spouse, with the PTA meetings, the homeschooling, the band practice, the women's group, and the bible study... yeah the same YOU without the day-care, live-in maid, live-in chef, with the big proposal due next Tuesday and that big promotion on the line? The same YOU with the acid-reflux, sleepless nights, hypersensitive, hyper-reactive and irritable responses.....
the YOU with the "short fuse"...
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Is there anyone in your life, with all those same stressors, with all those priorities who is not... "anxious"?
Here is your wakeup call.... you do not have an anxiety disorder... it is very likely that your level of anxiety is in PERFECT proportion to the amount of sh*t on your plate. Medication is not going to make that better... Self-medicating is definitely not going to make that better... But understanding anxiety, understanding health, and understanding what is a REASONABLE EXPECTATION FOR YOURSELF will help. Stop being so hard on yourself and assuming you can't do it all because you are "broken" and have "anxiety". Understand that your mind and body are very possibly responding (completely appropriately) to the amount of stress YOU have put it under.
If any of this resonates with you, it may be time to talk to someone to help you get a better understanding of what you're going through and how to make it better. Life coaches, counselors, therapist, and of course psychiatric professionals are amazing places to start. You're not broken, you're just anxious.
xoxo
Dr.R
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*Statements on this site have not been evaluated by the Food and Drug Administration. Any products reviewed are not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent disease.**Just because I am 'a doctor' does not make me your doctor - interaction on this or any other post does not constitute the establishment of a provider-patient relationship. Always contact your personal health care providers before doing anything you read on any website***As always, if you or someone you know is having thoughts to harm themselves or someone else contact 911, your local EMS or police department*